As a first generation Indonesian-American with an immigrant father, I believe it’s so important to visit your parent’s home country at least once in order to not only understand where they come from, but also connect with your culture and heritage.
In the 1970s, my biological father (biodad) embarked on a life-changing journey to America, leaving behind the vibrant culture of Jakarta, Indonesia. He settled in Brooklyn, NY where he’d ended up raising my three sisters, as well as being a baker at a prominent bakery in Bay Ridge. I was raised by my mom, a second generation Irish-American, starting off in Long Island, but eventually moving to Brooklyn, as well.
Growing up with my Irish family, I never got to experience life with my Indonesian family. No holidays, no cousins, no customs. I didn’t get to experience family dishes that we’d only make on holidays. Sadly, my biodad passed away shortly after we connected, so I wasn’t able to ask him a lot about his childhood, but he told me some things. He said Jakarta was a very busy city and that he had 15 brothers and sisters. He also told me that opportunities can be hard to come by in Indonesia.
Eager to understand his past, I set out on a memorable trip to Indonesia in 2023, for my 40th birthday, to immerse myself in the rich tapestry of his native country.
My exploration began with a visit to Bali, one of the most popular tourist destinations in the world and a prominent part of Indonesia’s tourism landscape. Renowned for its stunning beaches, lush landscapes, vibrant culture, and rich traditions, Bali attracts millions of visitors each year. The island’s popularity is not only due to its natural beauty but also its diverse range of attractions, including ancient temples, bustling markets, and unique cultural performances.
Despite its popularity among tourists, Bali remains an integral part of Indonesia, contributing significantly to the country’s tourism industry. The juxtaposition of traditional Balinese customs with the influx of international influences creates a unique and dynamic atmosphere. Travelers often flock to Bali to experience its distinctive blend of spirituality, art, and hospitality.
While our time in Bali was a memorable experience, it wasn’t my biodad’s Indonesia. While Bali is a stunning and culturally rich destination, it does offer a somewhat curated or tourist-oriented view of Indonesia. The island’s unique charm, artistic performances, and tourist attractions may not fully represent the day-to-day life experienced by the majority of Indonesians. To gain a more realistic view of everyday life in Indonesia, you need to explore different regions, cities, and rural areas that collectively contribute to the diverse tapestry of the country. Each region in Indonesia has its own distinct culture, traditions, and way of life, and experiencing these aspects beyond the tourist hubs provides a more comprehensive understanding of Indonesia’s socio-cultural dynamics.
As I left Bali, sitting in a car on the ferry to Java, the island my biodad was from, I started to feel more and more connected to Indonesia. This started to make more sense. It felt like I was really visiting people, as opposed to just visited destinations.
While Bali was full of non-Indonesian or Southeast Asian tourists, Java was very different. It was rare for me to see tourists there, but if I did, they were mostly also Asian. Additionally, English was harder to come by which meant my limited Bahasa Indonesia came in very handy. Embarking on a week-long road trip across Java wasn’t just a journey across stunning landscapes; it felt like retracing the steps of my ancestors and connecting with a piece of my heritage. Starting in Banyuwangi, where the Ijen Crater’s ethereal blue flames danced in the early morning, and then heading to Malang with its colonial charm and the historical sites felt like whispers from a bygone era. Yogyakarta, with its Borobudur Temple and the Sultan’s Palace, seemed to breathe life into the pages of my family’s history. Traditional dances and local flavors weren’t just experiences; they were threads weaving me into the tapestry of my family’s culture. As we rolled into Jakarta, it all started to feel different. The capital’s hustle and bustle felt like home, like the heartbeat of a city that has witnessed generations come and go. Generations of my family.
Walking through the streets of Jakarta, I could sense the echoes of my biodad’s footsteps from decades ago. The vibrant markets, the aromatic street food, and the warmth of the people resonated with the few stories he shared of his youth. Every time we saw a bakery, we were pulled to go in and experience the smells and tastes that perhaps helped guide my biodad to a career as a professional baker, making the most delicious cakes and confectionaries I’ve ever tried before in my life.
But it wasn’t all idyllic rainbows. I also saw the struggles of growing up in a country that has such economic disparity between the haves and the have nots. Believe me, I get it. I live in America.
I tried to spend my time in Jakarta experiencing as much as I could, eating at local restaurants and warungs, shopping at local markets, and exploring destinations of cultural importance. I talked to as many people as I could and with time, felt more and more at home. Even more than the moment I stepped foot in Indonesia, which was already transformative.
Reflecting on my experiences in Indonesia, I realized the importance of appreciating the diverse perspectives that shape our understanding of the world.
The living conditions and societal dynamics in Indonesia were distinct from what I knew in the U.S., yet there was a resilience and contentment that defined the people’s lives. The trip became a profound lesson in gratitude, as I appreciated the simple joys of life that might be taken for granted in another setting. This Indonesian adventure reinforced the value of cultural exploration for individuals, like me, with immigrant backgrounds. It is an opportunity to forge connections, gain insights into family history, and foster a deep appreciation of our roots.
To those who share a similar background, my advice echoes what I’ve learned through this transformative journey: embark on the voyage to your family’s native land. Immerse yourself in the lifestyle, connect with locals, capture moments through photographs, and explore various regions. The lessons learned during these travels are timeless, contributing to a richer understanding of one’s heritage and fostering a sense of cultural pride.
